The First Trial
The following morning, the group gathers in the commons around a low wooden table. Lumi sits cross-legged on the floor, his cheeks stuffed with honeyed bread and an extra serving clutched in his hands. Khimi slumps into the chair behind him, looking drained of energy. Dark circles cling to his closed eyes, and he rests his hands wearily on his stomach. Across from them sit Mido and Augustus, lounging in tall backed chairs and clearly stuffed from the feast they had carried back from the dining hall.
Ennui’s voice drips with venom as she speaks up. “You two are imbeciles,” she declares. “You went off and met this Gilbert, agreed to some trial without me? These… chosen, some of them have dangerous reputations. You can’t just go off doing things like this without thinking it through.”
Lumi replies swiftly, speaking around mouthfuls of bread. “I thought about it plenty, Ennui.” His tail thumps against the ground energetically as he continues. “What choice did we have?!”
Khimi’s weary voice interjects a cautionary note. “Lumi…”
“What did you do to him?” Ennui asks, eyeing Khimi’s exhausted state.“He looks like he hasn’t slept in days.”
A smirk tugs at Lumi’s lips as he turns towards her. “Oh, I’m sure you’d love to know.”
“I figured as much,” Ennui grunts. “Of course.”
“I am fine,” Khimi whispers wearily. “I was lost in my thoughts last night, unable to sleep while contemplating whatever this trial may entail.”
Mido chimes in, lifting a heavy eyelid. “Did he tell you anything about it? Like having to read some holy scripture or perform some wild ritual?”
Augustus erupts into a fit of laughter, doubling over with his hand pressed against his side. “He certainly fits the mold of a dark and broody type. Perhaps he’s one of those infamous necromancers we’ve heard tales of. The ones who conjure up creepy crawlies for their own amusement.”
“I think he’s just broody,” Khimi whispers, his eyelids still heavy with exhaustion.
Ennui lets out a dismissive snort. “Oh really? Who would have guessed that the man shrouded in black robes with a flock of ravens trailing after him could possibly be dark and brooding?”
“He may seem intimidating, but I find him rather sweet,” Lumi counters defiantly. “I imagine living for centuries without anyone to share your experiences with can make a person feel tired and lonely.”
Mido interjects with a curious tilt of his head, “But isn’t that the fate of all chosen? To watch everyone else age and move on while you remain eternally bound to serve the gods?”
Lumi pauses, his gaze drifting towards the ceiling as he contemplates Mido’s words. “I suppose so,” he finally responds thoughtfully. “It must be difficult to continuously witness the lives of others and know that everyone you meet is destined to disappear.”
Augustus scoffs at his words, “You make it sound like being chosen by the gods is a curse.”
Mido clears his throat, “I think… there is truth in what Lumi says. When I met Saint Nina, I knew that there was sadness behind every word. Like she saw something in me. I think she saw the same thing in me that she sees in everyone that comes through her doors. That she will long outlive them, that putting herself closer to them would only open her to more pain.”
“Is that why she’s so selective with whom she speaks to intimately?” Augustus questions, smirking and glancing at Lumi.
“She didn’t treat me any differently–”
“Whatever, Lumi!” Ennui snaps, waving her hand dismissively. “The point is, Khimi and you have a trial today, and you two were busy snogging all night like rabbits.”
“We were not!” Lumi grumbles before Khimi scoffs and raises an eyebrow. “A-anyway, Gilbert said this was going to be an easy trial.”
“So you’re just going to take it lightly?” Ennui asks aggressively. “What if it’s a trial by combat? That man may look old, but he has years of experience under his belt. You saw what Raul did.”
“I highly doubt it will be a trial by combat,” Khimi replies quickly, sitting up straight and placing a reassuring hand on top of Lumi’s head. “But even if it is, we’ll be ready for it, won’t we?”
Ennui scoffs and brushes her dark locks out of her face. “Lumi doesn’t even have his spear anymore. And neither of you have practiced much since we left Sidi.”
With a mouth full of honeyed cake, Lumi eyes Ennui skeptically. A mischievous smile plays on his lips as he speaks, “I don’t really NEED a spear. It’s just something nice to have.”
Ennui, leaning against the wall, then mumbles her response, “You’re better with one than without.” Her voice is laced with dry amusement. “You’re quick with your hands, I’ll give you that. But the spear gives you options. You don’t have to get close.”
Lumi turns to Khimi for support, “I can just… call one into my hands or use one of the javelins I summon.” He shoots a confident glance at Khimi before turning back to Ennui. “Right, Khimi?”
Khimi’s reply is measured and cautious, “If you can maintain the form long enough.” He continues, “you know you can’t focus long enough to hold onto its corporeal form.”
Rolling his eyes in frustration, Lumi counters, “I did it before… and I’m getting better.”
“Mmm,” Ennui responds with a skeptical laugh. “You’re still shit with magick when you don’t channel the divine’s power.”
Lumi’s tone hardens, “I told you before… I’m not going to use it unless we have to. Every time I touch those powers, people die.”
“People die every day, Lumi. From your magick or not, it doesn’t matter,” Ennui retorts.
“Either way!” Lumi growls in frustration. “There is no reason to use it here. We’ll be fine! He’s probably just going to make us read some stupid book!”
Ennui’s laughter cuts through Lumi like a knife. “That’s rich. Hopefully Khimi can do the reading, because if you have to read anything… this trial will take years.”
Lumi shakes his head in exasperation. “Why are you so mean?”
Augustus pats his stuffed belly contentedly. “She’s just speaking the truth.”
Khimi playfully tousles Lumi’s hair, trying to ease his nervousness. “Don’t worry, like you said, this one will be easy. The old man said we deserve a break from our lengthy journey.”
Lumi’s face lights up with excitement. “Yeah! And he was so kind to us. I can’t imagine he would do anything to harm us.”
Ennui rolls her eyes and snaps at them. “You’re both too trusting. He’s probably plotting something as we speak.”
Khimi chuckles and stands up from his chair. “Come on, Ennui. If he wanted to harm us, he would have had plenty of time by now… I want to believe he does not mean to harm us.”
Augustus chimes in, smacking his lips thoughtfully. “The different orders of the Faith don’t always get along. In the past, there were conflicts and battles between them. They even had wars, according to historical texts. So maybe it’s best to be cautious during this trial.”
Mido leans over the arm of the chair and tries to reassure them. “But I’m sure you two will be just fine. After all, you are chosen and Khimi is smart enough for the both of you.”
Lumi pauses, his eyes closing in deep thought. “I am more than capable on my own as well.”
Ennui and Augustus burst into laughter at his statement. Ennui bends over, slapping her knee in amusement.
“I am!” Lumi insists, pouting slightly.
“Ennui,” Khimi whispers sternly, narrowing his eyes at her. “Remember that I owe my life to him… in case you’ve forgotten.”
“I haven’t,” she snaps back suddenly, avoiding his gaze.
“I know,” Lumi interjects before things can escalate. “Let’s just focus on seeing Gilbert now. We don’t know what will happen, but I want you all to know how much it means that you’re here with us. Even you, Ennui.”
Ennui scoffs and looks away. “As if I had a choice.”
“You did have a choice,” Khimi mutters from behind Lumi.
Ennui chuckles. “I’m sure you wouldn’t have made it this far without me.”
Lumi’s tail swishes anxiously behind him as he pulls at the hem of his tunic. “If anything happens to us, please do your best to stay safe.”
Augustus’ laughter fills the room. He turns his gaze to Ennui, a mischievous glint in his eyes.“I wouldn’t worry about them harming an acolyte or his guardian,” he says with a chuckle. “But Ennui, on the other hand, I’m surprised they even let her step foot in this place.”
Lumi lets out a sigh and crosses the room to the door, his steps heavy with anticipation. He places a trembling hand on the knob and looks back at his companions with a nervous smile. “This is it,” he mumbles, trying to hide his fear. “Wish us luck.”
As Lumi swings open the door and steps into the hallway, his heart begins to race. He can’t shake Khimi’s words from earlier about their past lives and the fact that their souls have never found peace before.
Suddenly, a deep, gruff voice rings out in his mind — Y’sol’s voice. “Be not afraid, little lion,” she says reassuringly.
Lumi opens his mouth to respond, but no words come out. Fear grips him tightly as Khimi pushes him forward down the hall, walking silently beside him. Together, they make their way through the tower without exchanging a single word. Lumi’s unease is evident in the rapid flicking of his tail, but Khimi understands and takes hold of it, pressing against the sharp bony end with soothing circles.
As they step out onto the bridge, the cold wind whips around them and chills them to the bone. The familiar gloom of the north consumes them as soon as their feet touch the frozen stone. Across the distance, a small flock of ravens gather on either side of the stony railing, waiting for them. Their raucous squawks break the quiet air as they flutter towards Lumi and Khimi, joining them on their journey. With each step, the ravens walk and hobble alongside them, guiding them towards their destination.
“They’re so annoying,” Lumi mutters uncomfortably, pulling his hood tighter around his face as he steals a glance at Khimi.
Khimi gives a slow nod and continues onward in silence. His boots send cracks over the thin ice.
The second tower looms before them, somehow more menacing and dark than the day prior. The depth of the ravine seems endless, extending far beyond what his eyes can see. The ravens take flight and gather before the double doors, turning to stare back at them with their glassy pupils.
Lumi slides beside Khimi and takes his hand. The doors open before them, and the ravens retreat back into the darkness of the tower. Lumi manages a smile at Khimi before he steps in front of him.
“We’ll be fine,” Khimi says swiftly. “Whatever happens in there, we’ll make it through.”
Lumi furrows his brow in thought and whispers, “I know.” He takes both of Khimi’s hands in his own. “I ju–”
Before he can finish his thought, Khimi presses his lips against Lumi’s. The ice beneath them cracks as Khimi falls to his knees, bringing Lumi down with him. Heat radiates from Khimi’s body as he holds Lumi close, his breath hot against Lumi’s neck.
“K-Khimi,” Lumi whispers into his ear, the strength of Khimi’s embrace pulling their bodies together. “W-what’s wrong?” he stammers.
Khimi’s lips trail along Lumi’s neck as he whispers again, “We’ll be fine.”
Lumi wraps his arms around Khimi’s neck, feeling a sudden surge of confidence. “I know,” he responds bravely. “No matter what challenges the gods throw at us, we will face them together.”
Khimi’s lips find his once again, their mouths moving urgently against each other’s. Lumi succumbs to the warmth of Khimi’s touch and closes his eyes, feeling Khimi’s hands roam up his tunic.
Lumi manages to mutter Khimi’s name between kisses and whimpers.
Khimi’s grip tightens on his ass, his fingers digging in as he presses his lips harder against him. And just as quickly as it begins, it ends. Khimi straightens his jacket and trousers before whispering, “Just in case.”
“In case?” Lumi questions with a confused snort.
“In case I never get to feel you again,” Khimi replies, giving Lumi a flickering smile as he places a hand on Lumi’s shoulder and leads him into the tower.
Lumi can’t help but snicker nervously as they enter the darkness. “Thought you said we’d be fine?”
“We will,” Khimi chuckles, surveying the familiar room.
Caution, Lumi. The gods cannot hear or see you in the inner sanctum.
“Khimi, where do you think the inner sanctum is here? In the Temple of Life, it was deep within the center.”
Khimi pauses before the door where the ravens had begun to flock around. “If I had to guess, I would say it was this library,” he responds. “Each of the inner sanctums are supposed to be representative of their order, right?”
Lumi shakes his head, “I-I don’t know. I never really went. I just know it holds a special meaning to Nina. It’s really beautiful inside.”
“I imagine this place holds significance to Gilbert. I think it’s fair to assume this is likely the inner sanctum here. Why do you ask?” Khimi questions, placing his hand on the door. “Do you need to tell me something?”
Lumi shakes his head, “No, I just… was wondering, is all.”
The door opens with a slow creak, revealing the infinite rows of bookshelves lining either side of the aisle. The high ceilings vanish into darkness and periodically throughout the room chandeliers hang from ropes, suspended from the impossible and unseen heights. The echo of their footfalls is the only sound which can be heard, until their eventual approach near the sitting area from the day before. Still seated in the same chair, almost as if he never moved since their last discussion, Gilbert slowly turns the pages of a tome. A collection of codices and scrolls rest atop the small table to the side and around him on the floor.
Gilbert’s sharp gaze shifts up between the two of them, and he adjusts the fabric of his elegant robes, pulling them tighter over himself. A low rumble emanates from his throat as he begins to speak. “Ah, back so soon?”
“It’s been… a whole day?” Lumi cannot help but whisper, taking in Gilbert’s somewhat disheveled appearance and the dishes scattered around the room.
Despite this, Gilbert nods with a small smile and closes the tome on his lap with an audible clap. As he holds the book against his chest, he releases a long sigh. “Indeed, it has been a whole day,” he states with closed eyes. “Are you prepared, then?” he asks, his voice low and steady.
“Yes,” Khimi mumbles, looking up and around at the endless ceiling above them. “But… are we doing the trial here?”
Gilbert nods again, tilting his head slowly and purposefully. “The trial will take place in my library.”
Lumi can’t help but ask anxiously, “Is your library the inner sanctum?”
“The very same,” Gilbert replies with a hint of amusement in his tone. “Why do you ask? Is it because of the sudden calm and quiet in your mind?”
“I-I don’t usually hear the gods speaking loudly,” Lumi confesses, his ears twitching nervously. “Is that normal?”
“With the gods, who is to say what is normal?” Gilbert muses. “But I believe their voices will grow louder in time.” He rises slowly from his chair, leaning on his cane for support. “Now onto the trial itself. But before we begin, I must ask once more: are you both certain that this is what you want? To undertake the trials of the gods? It is not too late to turn back.”
“Turn back?!” Lumi snaps. “How could we possibly turn back now? We have come all this way!”
“Once you begin, it will be expected of you to appear before the other chosen,” Gilbert explains calmly. “That is, if you can pass the first trial.”
Khimi lets out a mirthless laugh and rests his hand on the hilt of his shamshir. “You said this would be easy,” he reminds Gilbert. “So, what is this trial?”
“Straight to business, just as I expected from Emir Zeybek,” Gilbert remarks with a small smile. He places the tome on the table atop a stack of others and continues, “The trial, as I stated before, is simple in concept. You must find your own story among the countless stories within the world of Talmus. But do not worry, I have every faith in both of you.”
“How long do we have?” Lumi whispers, raising an eyebrow.
Gilbert chuckles and leans against his cane. “No, no. There is no time limit. But, there are residents of the inner sanctum who protect it from nosey visitors. So I would urge you to be cautious and search with speed.”
“Are the books organized in any sort of order or fashion?” Khimi questions, unable to look past the rows. “They have to be… right?”
“No,” Gilbert laughs. “The books appear and fill the shelves, their authors unknown.”
Lumi sighs and throws his hands into the air. “Then can you at least tell us what it looks like?”
“I don’t remember,” Gilbert confesses with a shrug. “I think it may have been red… or gold. With black letters along the spine. Something like that. I think.”
“You d-dont remember?” Lumi questions with an irritated sigh.
“There are a lot of tomes in this library,” Gilbert teases. “Best you start looking.”
“Oh, we already started?!” Lumi asks, before starting to run off down the center aisle.
“I’ll remain here should you need me,” Gilbert mumbles.
Khimi gives Gilbert a nod and hurries past. “Lumi,” he grumbles, calling after him a half-dozen times before having to trot to catch up.
Lumi turns abruptly on his heels and begins to scour the nearest shelves. His hand runs along rows of books, the words on the spine nothing more than a jumble of words to him. Yet he at least could read his own name, and Khimi’s. He wonders if their story has its own title, or if they each had to find their own individual stories.
Each book is leather, dyed various shades, ranging from blacks and browns to striking’s reds. The lettering on most of the books appears to be written in metallic ink, gold or silver. Occasionally, there is one written in a black ink against the bright dyed leather.
Khimi approaches him while shaking his head. “What are you even doing? Do you even know what you’re looking for?”
Lumi scoffs, “I have no clue what I’m looking for… but, they all look like names. And our name is probably here too, right?”
Khimi steps beside Lumi and pulls a tome from the shelf before them. “They aren’t all names, Lumi. At least not all of these. This one is titled Tooth and Fang,” he mutters, shoving the book back onto the shelf. “Lumi… this could take ages.”
“Ages… ?” Lumi mumbles, appraising the small section before him. Taking a step back, he looks up and down the aisle. The bookshelves are endless, going on as far as the eye can see. “Khimi… this has got to be some sort of game or something, right?”
“He doesn’t seem to be in any sort of rush… I’m just concerned that by the time we finish here, what kinds of things will have gone on outside. Time sits still here for us, but everything outside goes on.”
Lumi groans and plants his face against a row of books, knocking them back against the shelf. “I don’t wanna stay here forever! I wanna see Nina and Aleyna!”
“Even Candela?” Khimi asks quietly, walking past him while observing the shelves. “Maybe we can make some patterns of it… cut our time down. I can start on one side, and you do the other.”
“Khimi… I can’t read. It’s hard to even piece these together,” Lumi whispers, his face still pressed against the leather. “Maybe you should tea—”
“Stop it!” Khimi snaps. He takes a deep breath before continuing. “Just try, Lumi. Just try. We don’t have time to wonder what we should be doing differently. Just keep going.”
Lumi turns back to look at Khimi, his eyes narrowed with a flicker of anger. But he presses on all the same. His finger scrolls over row after endless row of books, searching for anything that feels familiar.
***
The hours come and go, at least it feels like hours. The library is disorienting. Lacking any form of natural light, it is difficult to tell the time of day. Lumi’s arm grows sore from scrolling through the endless books and keeps his hands tucked inside the sleeve of his jacket.
“I would have thought the gods would have given us something different…”
“Different?” Khimi asks, slamming a codex shut. “Like what?”
Lumi spins on his heels, turning to Khimi while he raps his knuckles against his cheek. “Like… anything. This is so boring. Looking for a book.”
“It’s our story, don’t you want to read it?” Khimi questions.
Lumi tosses his hands in the air, while a string of garbled nonsense leaves his lips. He takes a deep breath and places his hands on his hips. “And… how would I read this book?”
“I can read it to you,” Khimi chuckles, turning back to the shelf. “I plan on teaching you… one day. But for now, you’ll just have to listen to my voice.”
“That’s not so bad. I won’t wanna learn to read if you’re reading to me… I don’t think we should read that book even if we find it. Knowing what comes next. I’ve been thinking about it. I don’t wanna know what will happen to us. Because then, nothing will feel like we have control. It’s not like we have control anywa— you get what I’m saying, right?” Lumi questions, his face screwed up in thought.
“No, I don’t. But if you don’t want me to read it. I won’t,” Khimi replies with a shallow sigh. “Would be nice though. Knowing how to handle all of these trials, when we’ll get back to Rhaz, maybe when you’ll have all my babies,” he says with a taunting glance.
Lumi’s snort echoes through the aisles of books, followed by a burst of laughter. “Oh, I told you,” he begins, pressing a finger against Khimi’s side. “I’m tryin’. I’ve been trying since we met.”
Khimi purses his lips, keeping his composure while he scours the shelf before him. “I don’t think you’ll be getting pregnant from your ass anytime soon,” he whispers playfully. “It doesn’t work that way.”
Lumi throws himself against the shelf beside Khimi, dragging his body along it with a dramatic whine. “But I’m trying for you!”
Khimi’s laughter leaves his lips before he can stop himself. “Let me know when you can work miracles,” he whispers.
“I am a god after all,” Lumi says with a regal air.
“Not quite, but close enough, I suppose.”
“Ugh, can we take a break?” Lumi pleads, pulling on Khimi’s trousers.
Khimi pushes his hand through Lumi’s hair, then tugs back, forcing Lumi to look into his eyes. “Lumi, we’ve barely even started. Look at how far we’ve gotten,” he says, motioning to where they had started.
“Maybe the trial is not opening the book,” Lumi whines, “I’ll ask Gilbert.”
“You’re wasting time,” Khimi grumbles, releasing Lumi’s hair.
“I’ll call him, maybe he’ll come. Let’s see…”
“Lumi don’t.”
“GILBERT!” Lumi’s voice booms through the library, across the endless bookshelves. “GILBERT, WE WON’T OPEN THE BOOK. WAS THAT THE TRIAL!? DID WE WIN?”
The disembodied voice echoes around them. Gilbert’s haughty laughter echoing through the endless rows. “Find the book,” he says before the laughter fades.
Lumi rolls his eyes at Khimi and pushes himself back up against the shelf. “He can hear us at least.”
“I guess so,” Khimi mutters, then reaches forward and tousles Lumi’s hair. He shoves him back towards the bookshelf across the aisle. “Get back to searching. Unless you want to stay here forever.”
Lumi puffs his cheeks and returns to the shelf, desperate to find any tome that sticks out to him. “How long do you think this is gonna tak—”
“LUMI!” Khimi grumbles, “please, just focus…”
Lumi sighs and continues his search. Book after book, shelf after shelf. Eventually, the mass of texts before him blur together in a mixture of colors. No longer able to focus, Lumi slides his finger across their spines, quickly picking random books from the shelf and thrusting them back in place.
After finishing an aisle of books, Lumi grumbles and turns to Khimi before they start on a second aisle. Bit by bit they continue, Lumi’s stomach howls with hunger, ringing out through the quiet of the library.
In the distance, a faint movement. A sudden swish and swoosh. It approaches, growing louder by the moment.
Khimi’s hand reaches for the shamshir at his side, while Lumi looks up at the darkness for the source.
A creature dark as the endless heights above them crashes onto the towering shelves. Books scatter and spray across the stony floor. The dark talons bend and rip into the wood, breaking through it as if it were made of paper. A guttural cry rings out through the library, the wings of the beast spread out, reaching over the aisle. Its glossy beak snaps at Khimi, before it releases another angry squawk.
“Hells!” Khimi calls out, ripping his shamshir from its scabbard. “The guardian?!”
Lumi is stunned, his eyes shake in awe. The raven is made of monstrous proportions. Mythical even. “W-what is it?”
“The bloody fuck do you think it is?” Khimi growls, swinging his blade against the beast’s attack. “It’s a raven…”
“Raphael,” Gilbert’s disembodied voice corrects suddenly. “The library’s guardian.”
Khimi steps backwards, the great beast pursues from the top of the shelf, book after book falling from the height of the shelves down across the stone.
Lumi is paralyzed, he reaches out to summon his spear, his lips not wanting to move with the incantation swirling in his mind. Khimi calls for him and breaks him from his stasis.
“Look for the book!” Khimi insists, rushing further down the aisle and drawing the creature’s attention.
Taking hold of the swathes of hair at the sides of his head, Lumi tugs in panic. “I-I can’t read!” he shouts down the aisle. “I’ll fight the bird!” His body trembles with panic.
“Like hells you will!” Khimi shouts, intercepting the sharp beak with his blade. “Lumi! Get to work!” His voice fades as he runs along the aisle and into the darkness. The massive beast close behind.
Lumi shouts after Khimi, only to hear Khimi repeatedly shout at him to search for the tome. His heart drums in his chest, the words before him seem to jumble even more under the duress of their situation. Pain shoots through his scalp with each aggressive tug at his hair. Khimi! Khimi! What’re you thinkin’?!
The occasional clang of metal and angry squawk brings a squeal of panic from his lips. Breath after breath, he forces himself to calm down. With both hands on the shelves, he begins to study the words before him.
Section after section he searches, shoving books onto the floor in his haste to glance at the covers. His breath hitches in fear after another loud clang and crash.
“Help me!” Lumi snaps under his breath. “Y’sol. Isha… anyone!”
The faint tap along the aisle brings a gasp to Lumi’s lips. “Gilbert?!”
Gilbert’s dark hair rests over his shoulder, a look of understanding on his face. He massages his brow and looks at the mess scattered about the floor. “Now look at what you’ve done.”
Lumi moves uncomfortably from the shelf and prepares himself, taking a wide stance, his arms raised in preparation for the saint’s next move. “I-I don’t want to fight you,” he stammers. “You wanted us separated! You sent the bird!”
Gilbert releases a heavy sigh and bends over to collect a tome. He dusts off the cover before returning it to the shelf, sure of its original home. “Fight you? That wouldn’t be fair. I’m an old man.”
Lumi scoffs, “You’re a saint! Don’t lie about what you can do…”
“Physically? You could likely take me… but when it comes to understanding and controlling our divine gifts, you wouldn’t last a second. Though, I am not here to fight you, Lumi. It’s true, I needed a moment alone with you. To share knowledge with you, a warning,” Gilbert begins, taking a step closer.
Lumi edges backwards, kicking the books behind his feet away. “What is it? What is the warning?”
Gilbert approaches all the same, his form towering over Lumi. He looks down his nose, his piercing eyes glaring through him. “We can speak candidly here. The sanctum is hidden from the gods, our words here are private, our thoughts are protected. These… places are made for us to be at peace, a moment of solace.”
“J-just spit it out!” Lumi whispers, his tail rising behind him with an aggressive shake. “What’re you saying?”
“Love. It is what drives some of our strongest emotions. Yet, it is a blade that cuts both ways. More often than not, both the wielder and the victim suffer from its sharpness,” Gilbert whispers with a nod. “That fact is not something that you should forget, Lumi. And don’t think for a second that the gods are ignorant of it either.”
“Why are you telling me this now?” Lumi whispers, relaxing his stance as Gilbert stands just before him. “Why not with Khimi?”
“Because Khimi is an intellectual. These words will bear too much weight on his mind. They will consume hi—”
“I’m not stupid,” Lumi protests, hanging his head. “I just… I don’t know things!”
“You’re not listening…” Gilbert scolds, his voice trailing as he looks past Lumi and down the aisle. “You must understand, it is your duty to obey the gods. You must! But, happiness only comes to those who seek it. I once loved like you… but my thirst for knowledge consumed me. By the time I left the bastion, my love had already left this realm. The gods felt nothing for my plight, for the loss of my love, instead, they urged me to carry on. I made a promise to the gods that if they brought back my beloved, I would follow their every whim. So I have been bound to their service until I expire by their divine will.”
“But… Y’sol likes Khimi. Ish—”
“Your gods will weave whatever tale is beneficial to gaining your trust, they need you. They want you to need them. And you must, or else… they will find a way to take it all away. Even if it is not within their direct capabilities,” Gilbert says, grabbing Lumi by the shoulder and shaking him. “The love you bear for Khimi, I can feel it. I’ve read it. I have seen your story, every intimate detail.”
Lumi’s heart pounds ever louder, the blood pumps through his ears. His cheeks fill with heat as bile rises in his throat. “Y-your gods aren’t my gods! They care about Khimi… they want us to be together! They helped save him,” he says in disbelief. “They helped us!”
“Because it furthered their goals, Lumi. Just think about it,” Gilbert says, once more looking past Lumi. “I just need you to understand what I am saying. I need you to promise me that you’ll think about it?”
Lumi nods quickly and glances back over his shoulder. The aisle remains dark, scraps of wood and books litter the floor. “I understand. Well, I don’t, but I’ll try.”
Gilbert sighs, “Little sun. The gods… are not infallible. They were once people, you know? Just like you or I. They were said to be the first saints of Talmus. Individuals who had gathered the faith and belief of the people behind their will and ideals.” He pauses, closing his eyes while his fingers tighten on the cane. “But just because people have faith in someone, or they believe in them, does not mean they are without fault, without sin. It does not mean they hid aspects of themselves in the shadows that they were not proud of showing in the light.”
“But they’re gods?” Lumi whispers incredulously. “Gods…”
“Their time as gods has made them distant from the people they once were. Cold, aloof. Some do not understand the common man,” Gilbert responds, a slow smile forming on his lips. “This is known by many of the chosen. Yet, we do not discuss it. The idea is too heretical for any to speak of outside the safety of the sanctum. Imagine how the Fai—”
Lumi’s eyes begin to fill with tears. “Don’t… I don’t want to know anymore. I can’t. The only reason I am alive is because of them. The only reason I met Khimi is because of the gods!” He slaps Gilbert’s hand from his shoulder. “Is this your trial?!” he shouts. “Is this a test?! Are you trying to turn me agai—” He stops himself, his breath passing between his clenched teeth.
“Lumi?” Gilbert whispers, “list—”
“No!” Lumi shouts. “What you’re saying doesn’t make any sense! Nina never said any of this!”
“You are too young to und—”
“You’re lying! People need the gods. The gods protect us. People need us to guide them!” Lumi shouts, his face tinged with color. “W-what you’re saying is wrong!”
“Calm down,” Gilbert grumbles, reaching a hand back to Lumi’s shoulder only to have it knocked away again. “People need the gods. They need the Faith. Without it, they are lost. They need you, Lumi. The Faith gives hope to the populace. It gives something for the faithful to believe in. But, if you want to achieve what you seek, it’s important that you remember what I told you.”
Taking hold of Gilbert’s billowing robes, Lumi grips the fabric and pulls himself closer. The heat in Lumi’s eyes shows in the crimson flare spreading through them. “Y-you can’t just leave something like this on me!” His fingers twist at the smooth fabric. “How could you even be a saint if you feel that way… ?”
Gilbert holds his gaze, his hand finally finds Lumi’s shoulder. “It is best not to hold the gods on a pedestal… if you are to remember anything I have mentioned, at least remember that.”
Lumi’s lips curl into a snarl. “Answer me!” He demands, shaking Gilbert with a rising anger.
“Because the gods need their voice,” Gilbert responds softly. “Because I fear who else would be chosen.”
“For someone who is supposed to know everything, you sure give shit answers,” Lumi replies, pushing against Gilbert.
Gilbert remains still, a stoic expression on his face. His hand moves along Lumi’s shoulder and to the top of his head. “What comes next for you both will be both the greatest and most dangerous journey of your lives. I only sought to provide you guidance, support, and insight you would otherwise never have.”
Lumi observes Gilbert’s expression. His breathing slowly returns to normal. “Why did you even agree to help us? I don’t understand.”
“This life is lonely — A common theme among the chosen. Some live in solitude, others bury themselves in crowds to drown their sorrow. But in their hearts, they know. Our hearts, our souls will always belong to the gods. But you have a chance for something beyond what awaits us. You can provide hope for us. That our stories don’t need to be filled with the solitude that we have been sworn to,” Gilbert whispers, brushing his fingers through Lumi’s hair. “You can provide us with hope, little sun.”
Lumi looks down at his feet, the wet streaks along his cheeks drop down onto the scattered pages. “That’s… a-a lot of pressure,” he chokes. “What if we fail? What if the other cho—”
“Don’t worry about failure, worry about making the journey first,” Gilbert whispers, releasing Lumi and reaching into his robe.
From beneath the shadows of his open robe, he procures a tome, bound in indigo-dyed leather. Along the front, on either side of the indiscernible script is an image stamped with gold. A youthful lion and a bull, staring at one another across the gap of jumbled letters.
Lumi tilts his head up at Gilbert, the tears in his eyes blurring his vision. “This is it? You had it the whole time… ?”
“I told you, Lumi. This trial would be one of your easiest. Now take it,” Gilbert whispers, holding the thick tome between them.
Lumi shakes his head, “I don’t want Khimi to read it… we shouldn’t read it.”
Gilbert smiles, “You’re right. This book isn’t meant for either of your eyes. One day you will live the things within these pages, learn from your experiences, and love each other as you do here,” he leans his cane against the nearby shelf and taps his fingers against the cover. “Look at this and tell me what you see.”
“A lion and a bull, and some script along the page,” Lumi whispers, taking hold of the book with both of his hands. The thickness of the volume surprises him, from cover to the back, he cannot reach around it. “What does it say?”
“A Journey of Fate,” Gilbert whispers, tapping his hand on the cover again. “Talman astrologers often look to the bull and the lion among the stars to find their way. When Nina first reached out to me, I began to study your story.” Gilbert’s thumb rubs across the leather cover. “The stars are something we still know little of. Each of them tells a story.” He pauses and taps his fingers on the figures on the front. “These stars are your stars. And here,” he whispers, his finger resting between the two figures. “This one i–”
“Stella Solaris…”
“You don’t need to read this to finish your journey. When your light dims, when the story grows dark, look to one another, Lumi,” Gilbert says, carefully taking the tome from between Lumi’s hands. “Look to the stars.”
Another crash in the distance rings out. The buckling creak of the wooden shelves, the steady and constant falling of the books across the stony floor. Lumi looks back for the source, watching the sight of flames erupt periodically through the darkness.
“That’s rich,” Gilbert mumbles under his breath. “I’d expect the Saint of Flames to burn down my library, not his lover.”
“Will he be alright?” Lumi questions, “That raven. He wa–”
“Raphael,” Gilbert interrupts, clearing his throat and raising his cane, then bringing it down onto the stony floor with a resounding tap. The floor rumbles, the shelves shift slightly with a magickal aura.
“What we discussed, remember to keep it to yourself,” Gilbert whispers with another nod of his head.
The sound of Khimi’s blade swishing deep in the distance fades, and within a few short moments, Lumi can hear Khimi’s boots against the stone. He sighs and relaxes at Khimi’s appearance from the depths of the aisle.
“Lumi!” he shouts, thrusting his flaming shamshir back into the scabbard. “What happened?”
Lumi begins to speak, only for Gilbert to shout over him. “Lumi managed to get his hands on the tome just a bit ago. So I called Raphael back.”
“He just vanished… I was worried that something happened to Lumi,” Khimi pants, his hand still tight on the hilt of his shamshir.
Gilbert approaches Khimi, stepping past Lumi. He gives Lumi a look out of the corner of his eyes. “Though, there is something you should both hear now that you have completed the first trial.”
“Where is the book, Lumi?” Khimi asks, his breathing ragged from running.
Lumi stammers, looking to Gilbert for support.
“It’s taken care of. The book was never meant to be read by your eyes, it was merely part of the trial.”
“So you were right?” Khimi questions, raising his brow at Lumi. “Look at that,” he mumbles, placing his hands on his hip and relinquishing a deep breath. “So that’s it? We did it? Just like that?”
“Just like that,” Gilbert laughs, clapping a hand on Khimi’s shoulder. “Now all that remains is for me to give you my blessing,” he whispers, tightening his grip with a thorough shake.
“Blessing?” Lumi asks, “What type of blessing?”
“Every order is different in how they give their blessings. Ours here is simple. I will mark you both with sacred ink from an ancient relic of our orde—”
“I-is it permanent?!” Lumi wonders aloud, “I don’t have any markings like the other aslan fr–”
“No,” Gilbert says, “it’s just a simple thing. A smudge of ink across your forehead to represent your connection to the order. Once it washes away, the physical manifestation may not be present, but you will know that our order will always be with you.”
Khimi bows his head in thanks, and Lumi follows suit. “We’re grateful for your kindness,” Khimi says, before raising his head and smiling with a cheerful grin at Lumi. “Though your beast was… a worthy foe.”
Gilbert chortles while waving a dismissive hand before him. “He is a fat old bird, hardly anything difficult for someone as young and spry as yourself.”
Khimi raises a brow, “Now you’re making me feel weak.”
Lumi eases past Gilbert and pushes his hand between Khimi’s arm, swiveling on his toes back to face Gilbert. “When can we do the blessing?”
“There is no rush,” Gilbert begins softly, “you could stay here at the bastion as long as your heart desires, though I know in my heart you will not be guests here long. Would you like to have the ritual performed with your friends as witnesses? Or perhaps you would be more comfortable having it done in privacy?”
Lumi’s expression softens as he looks up at Khimi for guidance. “Khimi, what do you wanna do?”
Khimi looks thoughtfully into Lumi’s eyes. “What if it was just Ennui?”
“Why just Ennui?” Lumi wonders, his fingers intertwining between Khimi’s.
Khimi glances at Gilbert, then back at Lumi. “Because… I have a feeling that Ennui will always be there for us,” he whispers, “once we get back to Rhaz, I suspect Nina may ask Mido and Augustus to return to the temple. Ennui will always be there.”
“She’s so mean,” Lumi croaks, before sighing and looking back at Gilbert. “We’d like to have one of our friends join us, if that’s alright?”
“For the devil herself to bear witness to the blessing of the gods. How curious,” Gilbert replies, a smirk playing across his lips. “It is an unorthodox request, but I suppose it is not entirely unprecedented.” He ponders for a moment, his eyes darting between Khimi and Lumi. “Very well,” he finally says, his voice laced with curiosity. “Ennui shall be present at the blessing.”
Lumi’s face lights up with a mixture of relief and excitement. He leans into Khimi, pressing their bodies close together. “Thank you! Thank you!”
Gilbert chuckles softly, the sound resonating through the darkness. “I cannot deny the peculiar charm of this arrangement. The gods may find it amusing as well.”
Blessing of Truth
As the days pass, the once-quiet halls of the bastion come alive with activity as preparations for the ceremony are underway. Lumi and Khimi are summoned to stand before a towering set of doors, their dark wood glinting with a polished sheen that reflects the light in dazzling patterns.
Lumi’s nerves are evident as he paces back and forth, his fingers fidgeting with the ends of his tunic. Behind him, Ennui’s tail matches his movements with an almost hypnotic rhythm. Khimi, on the other hand, sits calmly beside the door in a simple tunic, his back pressed against the stone wall. The weight of Rashid’s shamshir rests against his shoulder with his eyes closed tight.
“Stop pacing,” Khimi whispers, his voice calm and steady. “It’s exhausting to even listen to.”
Lumi lets out a frustrated sigh and sinks down onto the stony floor next to him, scratching at the golden choker around his neck. “I can’t help it! What else am I supposed to do?”
“Sleep. Rest. Keep yourself occupied,” Khimi responds with a peaceful exhale.
Ennui, who had been standing silently in the center of the room, now approaches them both and takes a seat before them. “Is this really what you both want? You know… this journey won’t be easy, it’s going to take forever too.”
Khimi leans his head back against the wall, his eyes on the domed ceiling above them. It shimmers with a soft glow from the sunlight filtering through stained-glass windows, giving the space an almost ethereal quality. The stone of the rotunda is lighter than the dark gray stones that make up most of the bastion, almost gleaming white like marble.
Lumi’s lips tremble, wanting to answer Ennui, but unsure of what to say. He looks to Khimi, hoping he will answer.
“Nothing worth having comes easy,” Khimi whispers, his gaze still fixed on the ceiling.
Ennui sneers, following his gaze, drifting to the magnificent golden ceiling adorned with celestial designs. Lumi can only imagine that it depicts Elysium, a place he as a beastkin could never hope to know.
“You’ll be the most blessed individuals in Talmus by the time this is over.”
Khimi closes his eyes and leans his head against Lumi’s, whispering, “If the gods approve of our union… but this is what I want. I’ve always yearned to see the world again. And doing it all with Lumi, just makes it even better.” He brushes his lips against Lumi’s thick, rounded lion ears. “Don’t you agree?”
Lumi nods fervently, feeling Khimi’s chin pressing between his ears. “Of course,” he whispers reassuringly, looking up at Khimi with a small smile.
Ennui snorts and mutters under her breath, “Yes, well… we’ll see what the gods have to say about the two of you being together. Maybe they’ll strip away your gifts once they realize just how much of a perverted little lion you really are.”
Lumi smirks and leans forward, reaching for the tip of Ennui’s tail. His fingers wrap around the pointed end. “The gods already know all about us,” he teases, running his thumb and forefinger along the strange texture.
Ennui scoffs and yanks her tail out of Lumi’s grasp. “The gods have no clue what they’ve gotten themselves into.”
“Maybe so,” Khimi murmurs as he settles back against the stone wall. “But at least Lumi follows their will. They have nothing to worry about.”
“Do you think your gods will allow you to roam freely across the realm?” Ennui questions, eyeing Lumi’s rattling tail.
“As long as I do what they want,” Lumi replies, folding his arms and resting against Khimi, “I can’t see why not.”
“And what do they want from you now?” Ennui asks, rocking back and forth on her heels.
Lumi glances at Khimi before answering, “I don’t know. They just told me to grow stronger. So I guess I’ll just keep gettin’ stronger.”
Ennui shakes her head. “I’ve only ever spoken to one saint at length… and let’s just say it didn’t end well.”
“Davani?” Khimi mumbles, referring to her previous encounter in Sidi.
Ennui hums to herself, her fingers tapping out an absent rhythm on her thigh. “I only spoke with her momentarily,” she explains, her eyes fixed on a distant point. “Even at your mother’s little party for the new Emir Zeybek, she only ever shot angry glances at me.”
“What about Nina?” Lumi whispers curiously, his head tilted in confusion.
“Don’t know,” Ennui replies with a tinge of annoyance. “Can’t say I’ve ever met her, either. Maybe we’ve crossed paths briefly. But Kaeva… I met her years ago. Their troupe was traveling through the southern lands of Loria. I was just a young girl then… if fate had been kinder, perhaps I would have stayed with them. But things didn’t work out that way.”
Lumi nods slowly, his mind processing this information. “Wow… that must have been forever ago,” he ponders aloud.
Ennui’s mouth drops open in shock and before Lumi can react, she swings at him with startling speed. “Are you calling me old?” she growls, her eyes narrowing in a playful.
Lumi chuckles nervously and quickly moves closer to Khimi, seeking protection behind him. His tail tucks under his legs as he mumbles, “No, no! I just meant it must have been a long time ago!”
“Same difference,” Ennui grumbles, still not completely convinced.
“Cut it out,” Khimi interjects in a commanding tone. “We want to look presentable.”
Ennui lets out an exasperated sigh, but reluctantly follows Khimi’s command. “If those tunics they gave you are what passes for presentable,” she remarks, gesturing to their simple and worn attire, “then I don’t think anything else matters much. You both look like sacks of –”
The door beside them begins to open slowly, a beam of bright light flooding into the rotunda. Khimi stands first, bringing Lumi to his feet with him. Ennui remains seated, shielding her eyes from the sudden brightness.
As the door opens fully, Gilbert materializes in the doorway. His robes are dark, billowing, and richly patterned, standing out sharply against the stark white light pouring in behind him. The weight of his ornate cane echoes off the stony tile as he takes a few slow steps forward. The raven on his shoulder squawks loudly before taking flight across the grand rotunda.
Gilbert pauses, surveying them with a slow smile spreading across his lips. “You both look stunning,” he remarks with a cheerful grin.
Khimi responds quickly, “I had expected more elaborate ceremonial garb…”
“Ornate?” Gilbert muses. “Not at all. The simplicity of your attire allows you to focus solely on each other without suffering any distractions.”
With a graceful movement, Ennui rises from the floor and straightens her posture. The tip of her tail cracks through the air behind her like a whip, commanding his attention.
“You must be the famous Ennui,” Gilbert remarks, his tone laced with admiration. “Your tales have not gone unnoticed by my gods. I would have words with you prior to your departure.”
Ennui snorts in response. “Hopefully they depict my better qualities. I cannot say I am thrilled to hear that the Saint of Truth has heard of me.”
Gilbert gestures to Lumi and Khimi. “I did read their tale, after all. And I must say… the devil played quite a significant role.”
A mischievous glint shines in Ennui’s eye as she runs her fingers through her silky hair. “Hear that, boys? The devil is part of your story.”
Lumi rolls his eyes with a sigh. “Perhaps you could show a bit more kindness now and then? Since you’re a part of our story.”
Ennui purses her lips in amusement. “Oh, I highly doubt it.”
Khimi chuckles and steps behind Lumi, his fingertips softly tracing the nape of his neck before trailing down to the small of his back. “Would it be so difficult for you to show a little kindness towards him?” His golden earrings glint in the light as he tilts his head.
Gilbert leans on his cane and claps his hands together. “It seems you two will have much to discuss later.”
Ennui rolls her eyes and pushes past Khimi, giving his shoulder a playful nudge. “Sure, since you asked so kindly,” she whispers with a sly grin. “I’ll be sweet to your little lion.”
They follow Ennui into a magnificent room, bathed in an impossibly bright light pouring from the windows which tower on both sides. The light itself seems intentional, too perfect to be natural. Across the room, the glow illuminates marvelous white stone benches and columns. At the front of the sanctuary stands an altar made of dark stone, black as jet. It looms over the surrounding brightness, drawing their gaze and attention towards its formidable form. Along the wall behind it, floor-to-ceiling mosaic tiles in myriad colors, shimmer against the radiant light.
“Ya sure this isn’t the inner sanctum?” Lumi questions, stepping through the room and taking Khimi’s hand.
Khimi walks beside Lumi, one hand holding Lumi’s while his other grips the shamshir tight. “This is magick I suppose,” he mutters to himself.
Ennui approaches the altar and veers off to the side, turning back to them with a mocking bow. “So how does this thing start?” she asks, nearly shouting through the room to Gilbert.
The doors shut behind Gilbert with an audible bang. He folds his robe across his chest while he crosses the distance to the altar. “It’s simple, just like that,” he snaps his fingers, “It will be over just as quickly as it started.”
Lumi steps up to the altar, curiosity getting the better of him despite the warning looks from Khimi. “You said there was ink?” he asks, scanning the surface for an inkwell.
Khimi places his shamshir down beside the column opposite Ennui, “Lumi, wait just a se–”
Without hesitation, Lumi slaps his hands onto the dark structure. The wetness of it catches him off guard, and he recoils, his hands now coated in a deep black ink. Letting out a groan, he moves to wipe his hands on his tunic before Khimi grabs his wrists and stops him just in time. The sound of frustration escapes Khimi’s lips as he clicks his tongue in disapproval.
“Lumi,” he scolds gently, shaking his head. “I don’t think you should have touched that.”
Gilbert clears his throat, drawing their attention back to him. “That would be one of our sacred relics,” he explains, gesturing to the altar. “The ink from this altar flows eternal. Those who touch it are bound to the truth until it fades.” He takes a step past them, his cane pointed at Ennui.
Ennui takes the object with a sly grin, twirling it in her fingers before launching it into the air. “So, Lumi, tell us true,” she taunts, her voice laced with malice. “Is it Khimi you love, or just his cock?”
Lumi’s expression turns to one of discomfort as he casts a pleading glance at Gilbert. “Both,” he confesses in a hushed tone. “Why do you have to be so cruel, Ennui?”
Ennui only chuckles and leans against a nearby column, watching the scene unfold with delight in her crimson eyes.
“Does it hurt?” she prods, gesturing at Khimi’s body. “Taking such a fat cock up your ass?”
Gilbert can’t help but shake his head, sighing as he looks down at Lumi. “Just answer her question honestly,” he urges. “It’ll go by quicker.”
Khimi can no longer contain his laughter, shaking with mirth at the absurdity of the situation. “That’s enough, Ennui,” he finally interjects.
But Ennui is not deterred, continuing to prod and tease until Lumi’s patience snaps, and he yanks himself away from Khimi’s grasp.
Gilbert sneers at Ennui, reaching into his robes for something hidden within. “Shall we mark you with the sacred ink as well?” he taunts with a malicious glint in his eye.
Ennui grumbles while twirling Gilbert’s gnarled cane between her slender fingers. Her eyes flicker with annoyance as she responds, “No thanks. I would rather not be forced to tell the truth. If you don’t mind, of course.”
Gilbert’s response is calm and understanding, “It doesn’t bother me, but perhaps for the sake of your friends, it would be a kindness?”
Khimi adds his own playful jab, “Yes, Ennui. Do it for our sake so we can hear about all of your daring exploits.”
Lumi joins in with a taunting grin, “Yeah! Mamir almost told me something juicy until he saw you and clammed up.”
Ennui leans back against a white column and laughs heartily, “Good. Mamir better keep his mouth shut if he knows what’s best for him.”
“If that is all.” Gilbert looks between them with a nod of confirmation, “Then we’re all prepared.”
Standing tall and regal at the altar, Gilbert beckons for the two figures before him to approach. With a determined expression etched onto his face, he rummages through his robe until he finally retrieves what he had been searching for – a brush. The handle is carved from a pure white stone, adorned with golden rings that spiral down its length. Soft, dark bristles make up the body of the brush, their tips fluttering in anticipation of their purpose.
“Do you both understand your role in this ritual?” Gilbert asks, his voice filled with quiet confidence.
Khimi and Lumi stand side by side, their hands intertwined as they face each other; ink smeared between their palms. Khimi’s pulse thrums through his hand and into Lumi’s, igniting a warmth within him.
With the utmost care and reverence, Gilbert pushes back Khimi’s sable locks, whispering an incantation under his breath. As he does so, the ink along the brush glows with an iridescent sheen, almost as if it has a life of its own. In one swift motion, he brings the tip of the brush across the center of Khimi’s forehead, leaving behind a trail of glistening ink that drips over his closed eyes.
Gilbert then turns to Lumi, offering a reassuring smile before placing a hand under the tip of the brush. They exchange a silent understanding before he delicately presses the brush against Lumi’s forehead. The ink feels cool against his skin, but also strangely comforting. With each carefully enunciated syllable of Gilbert’s incantation, Lumi feels the tip of the brush gliding across his forehead, leaving behind a trail of inky tendrils. This is the beginning of their journey together, and Lumi knows as the brush moves across his forehead, they are bound to it.
As Gilbert finishes his incantation in the common tongue, his words seem to linger in the air, carrying a sense of power and protection with them. “And may the Gods of Truth and Knowledge love and protect you on your journey,” he intones.
Stepping back from Khimi and Lumi, Gilbert smiles. “I can see the joy you bring one another,” he whispers, his words filled with warmth and adoration.
Ennui, always the instigator, taps the cane against the floor as she speaks up. “Hey Khimi, how many people have you fucked?”
Khimi lets out a sigh, while both Gilbert and Lumi turn their heads to her. Lumi’s heart flutters in surprise. He always believed Khimi when he said he had no prior partners before him, but under the compulsion of the relic, he couldn’t help but wonder if Khimi’s answer would differ.
“You already know the answer to that,” Khimi responds firmly, his fingers tightening around Lumi’s hand. “Just Lumi. And you already knew that!” His words are filled with annoyance.
Ennui smiles and shrugs. “We were estranged,” she says casually. “I didn’t know if you slept around a bit, or maybe just stuck with watching in brothels.”
Gilbert turns to the altar, his brush dripping with ink as he speaks. “I suddenly understand your reluctance to invite anyone, Lumi,” he says with a hint of sympathy. “Such aggressive questions must trigger deep feelings in your heart?”
Lumi whispers, his voice barely audible over the sound of the dripping ink between his and Khimi’s hands. “Sure… but Ennui always says what pops into her mind,” he explains. “I just… thought maybe she knew something I didn’t.”
Khimi’s grip tightens, causing the ink to squelch between their palms. “You thought I would lie about something like that?” he asks, a strain evident in his voice.
Lost for words, Lumi shifts his gaze down at his feet. “We had only met when I asked. I thought maybe you were being cautious,” he admits softly, his jaw nearly trembling. “I didn’t want to ask again or push anymore about it. I didn’t tell you everything, remember?”
Khimi sighs and runs his fingers through his hair with his spare hand, accidentally smudging the ink on his forehead. “Lumi, you could have just asked,” he says gently. “I would have told you.”
“I-it doesn’t matter, I always believed you!” Lumi mumbles in response, pushing against Khimi. “It’s just different knowing that you can’t lie… then all that stuff with Jilliana.”
“Lumi…”
Gilbert breaks their conversation by announcing the conclusion of the ceremony. “Though if you need a moment to gather yourselves,” he offers kindly, “Ennui and I can leave you both in peace.”
“We will, huh?” Ennui’s voice is filled with disappointment as she questions, tilting the ornate cane back to Gilbert while he carefully places the brush back into his pocket. “Things were just getting spicy.”
Taking the cane from Ennui, Gilbert then firmly grasps her jacket and pulls her along by the scruff through the center aisle. He glances back at them briefly, “Whenever you’re ready, we put something together for you in the dining hall.”
Ennui’s eyes widen in surprise and excitement. “Really? It’s already over? Just like that? What kind of ceremony…”
“I did say it would be quick. Besides, you and I must have words,” Gilbert snorts with a smug smirk, ushering her through the doors. He pauses before stepping out and turns back to them, “And… one last thing. Your friend’s family, they are in Wiltz. As I anticipated.”
Lumi nods and offers his thanks as the doors close behind them. He turns back to look up at Khimi, the dark ink smeared across his brow making him appear like a warrior. His voice is strained with worry as he whispers, “I’m sorry.” Lumi’s eyes glisten with unshed tears as he continues, “I didn’t… I didn’t think you lied to me.”
“Lumi, why would you even think there would be a diff–”
“Because of Jilliana!” Lumi snaps, hanging his head in shame. He can feel the heat rising in his cheeks, and his anger at the thought brings his blood boiling. “I-I can’t…” His voice trails off as he struggles for words. “I can’t! I can’t imagine anyone else touching you,” he says finally, his grip on Khimi tightening with each word. “I hate her! I hate her!” Tears stream down Lumi’s face as he confesses his feelings, his emotions raw and overwhelming. “What she did to you… gods punish her!”
Khimi tenderly strokes Lumi’s cheek, the dark ink of his fingers leaving a faint trail on Lumi’s skin. The gentle caress brings comfort and warmth to Lumi’s heart, but also fills it with worry.
“And what did she mean… about brothels?” Lumi asks, unable to hide the concern in his voice.
Khimi’s copper skin flushes a deeper shade. “It is a bit shameful,” he murmurs, still holding Lumi’s face in his hand.
“I wanna know,” Lumi insists firmly. “I need to know everything.”
Khimi bites his lip, seemingly considering how to word his answer. “When I was a mercenary, there were often offers from men and women who sought my company. But I never gave in to temptation or shared a bed with anyone. As a Zeybek at heart, I wanted to preserve our name and lineage. I didn’t want any potential bastards coming after me once they discovered who I truly was.”
Lumi wipes away tears with the back of his hand. “But… what about the men? It couldn’t have been possible for th–”
“Lumi,” Khimi whispers gently, forcing himself to smile as he repeats the name over and over again. “We cannot deny the parts of ourselves that we may not like. At that time in my life, I could not accept that I desired a different kind of love than just producing ten sons for Aleyna and Ziad. My struggles could have been solved if I had just accepted my duty and had children who would one day lead the Cerulean Star. But instead, I was born different, with different wants.”
“Khi–”
“I visited brothels across the Desert Cities, watching others freely embrace their desires while secretly wishing I could do the same,” Khimi’s gentle voice interrupts, breaking the silence that enveloped them. “But aren’t you happy?” he asks softly, his dark eyes searching Lumi’s face. “Knowing that you are what I want. I like to think… perhaps there was a reason I struggled for so long.”
Tears continue to fall freely down Lumi’s cheeks, but he manages to smile through them. “You’re so much better than me,” he whispers, his emotions overwhelming him.
“Better than you? What makes you even think that?” Khimi moves closer, their bodies pressed tightly together.
The dark ink on Lumi’s palm swipes across Khimi’s garment, staining the pure white fabric. “You know why,” Lumi replies, his face buried into Khimi’s chest as he clings onto him.
“Whatever happened before, you had no control over it,” Khimi says with an edge to his voice. He leans in closer to Lumi, his lips brushing against the tender skin between his ears. “Your brother, your tribe… you shouldn’t let that define you.” His words are low and hungry as he continues, “You were made for me, you know. You can feel it in your heart.” His hand glides over Lumi’s shoulders and down to his waist, drawing him in even closer. “You said as much, did you not?”
Lumi chokes back tears and lets out a shaky laugh as he wipes the wetness on his nose against Khimi’s chest. “I can feel it everywhere,” he murmurs, overcome with love and gratitude.
The fabric along Lumi’s waist is stained with dark ink, a stark contrast against the tan skin it clings to. Khimi’s strong grip crinkles the edges of Lumi’s tunic as he pulls it up the boy’s body, revealing his slender frame beneath. With a possessive tone in his voice, Khimi sinks his teeth into Lumi’s thick ear. His hand boldly explores beneath the tunic, tracing the smooth lines of his waist.
“You’ll only ever be mine,” Khimi whispers, his lips brushing against Lumi’s skin. “I’d sin a thousand times and a thousand more to be with you.”
Lumi gazes up at Khimi with sudden intensity, meeting his lover’s lips with ferocity. The feeling of Khimi’s hands against his bare skin makes him forget about the ink staining them both. All he wants is Khimi — the possessiveness, the aggression, the anger, the love, the desire, the need. He craves everything that Khimi has to offer and will stop at nothing to take it all in, take him all in.